Welcome To Raquel Blue's Living Hell
by As3hleigh XD
Summary: I'm Raquel Blue you better buckle up and take a ride into my living hell and find out just what its like to be me. RECE slash Triggers of self harm
1. Chapter 1

OK guys I know is til have all the others stories to update but I have been thinking of this one for a while and I decided to write it. Hope you like it... It will have diary entrees in it and its RECE Slash so yeah...

_Why is it_

_Why am I this way?_

_All I want is for you to say you love me _

_But you're with that blonde freak_

_I wish it could just be us_

_I wish you felt the same _

_We are best friends yes but I wish for more_

_I want you _

_I want your love _

_I want you to say you love me and always have..._

**ROCKY'S POV**

It hurts, it really hurts to see you with him, I want to be like you and Gunther I want to take Günter's place I want to be the one you love. I love you Cece Jones why can't you love me back.

Yes you probably have figured out by now that I Raquel Blue am in love with my best friend Cecilia Jones. Why? Well she is a great person she has a great personality she is flirty, funny, caring, friendly, awesome, rebellious (yes I love her rebellious side) and plenty more I could be here for hours. She also has the best looks her fiery red hair, blue/green eyes, perfect pink lips, amazing skin colour and she has the best body.

"Hey, hey" I hear the red head say as she comes into the house through the window.

"Hey Ce what's up" I say

"Not Much, Just wondering if we can chill tonight after my date with Gunther"

Oh yay more about the blonde one that stole my girl "yeah sure, can't wait to hear all about it" I lie and put on my best fake smile, as I do whenever I see them together

"YAY!" she says really happy. I love making Cece happy

"So what time will you be over?"

"Hmm about nine"

"Awesome see you then"

"Yay, can't wait I love you" She says hugging me if only she meant that as more than friends."Ok I have to go now see you at nine" She says before going out the window.

I sigh and sit on the couch and flip through the channels and Geordie Shore came on. It is such a weird show so many sluts. I watch it for a bit and then Ty comes home and starts watching it and laughing. Then he realises something in wrong. I haven't told him about me being lesbian but hopefully he wouldn't mind.

"Rocks what's wrong you look sad" He asks

"Ty what would you say if I told you I was gay"

"Well I don't know I wouldn't really care, it would be awesome actually... why?"

"Well Ty I am gay and that's the problem"  
"Ohhh, why is it a problem"  
"the girl I like is going out with someone and there is no way in living hell they would like me back"

"Are we talking about Cece?" he asks

"Yes and she only loves me as a best friend nothing more and I'm sick of hearing about Gunther this Gunther that it is really making this situation worse"

"Rocks its ok just be happy you never know what will happen" He says hugging me.

"Thanks Ty" I say before walking away and going to my room. I lay on my bed and think, think over everything just to organize my head. Saying random and useful things like:  
"am I really gay or are these feelings normal"  
"I need to stop being stupid"

"Where did I put my razor, great I'm screwed?"

"What if Ty founds out about other things"

"What If..."

My thoughts were interrupted when TY walked into my room looking angry and sad at the same time.

"What are these for" He say showing me my razor and a wash rag with blood on it. There is no way I am escaping this question. Bullying has been the worst thing in my life and TY found my only escape

I'm Raquel Blue and welcome to my living Hell.

**So there you go a new story this is based on the things going on in my life and I just wanted to make it into a story just too... I honestly don't know why. Hope you liked it. Reviews are appreciated thanks: D**

**XxxAshleighxxX**


	2. Chapter 2

**Ok guys here is the second chapter. Hope you like it. **

"Ok Ty it is not what it looks like, I swear" I say

"What does it look like Rocky, I don't want you to be hurting yourself" He says, looking like he is about to cry

"I'm not Ty, I promise" I say crying myself

"Lift up your sleeves"

"No"

"Rocky" he says grabbing my shirt and pulling up the sleeves. "Oh My God Rocky, why" He says backing away and sitting on my bed.

"Ty I'm sorry, I really am" I say

"Why are you sorry Rocky" I hear Cece say

"Uhh Cece, hi I thought you went out with Gunther" I say

"He cancelled his mum is sick and Tinka is out" she says.

"I will leave you two to talk, I will talk to you later Rocks" Ty says and walks out closing the door

"OK whits going on"

"Nothing at all"

"What's that on your bed" she says, CRAP! She saw the razor and wash cloth Ty left there Nooo.

"Rocky" She says really upset "Why"?

"Cece it's from all the bullying that's been happening"

"What bullying?" She says confused

"You know about being gay that my dad was a freak coz of the way he died"

"Why didn't I know about this"  
"because you are always of sucking face with that blonde freak"

"You mean Gunther, He isn't a blonde freak, HOW COULD YOU, I THOUGHT YOU WERE MY FRIEND"

"Cece I didn't mean it like that"  
"Well it sounded like it"

1 hour of fighting

"I'm leaving and we are no longer friends, I hate you Rocky, I don't know how I ever liked you "she says walking off crying.

I slam my door shut and slide down the door. Why did I have to say blonde freak out loud? I am such a bad friend WHY? I start crying and I hear someone come through my window.

"Rocky" I hear them say... Is that Deuce why is he here

"Deuce" I say looking up and wiping my eyes "why are you here"

"Well I need to talk to you but that can wait your upset" he says hugging me

"Thanks Deuce" I say leaning into his embrace. Oh my god it feels so good to be in a guys embrace maybe I'm not Gay after all maybe I'm Bi? Oh well I will Just Enjoy this moment while it lasts.

"Deuce"

"Yeah"

"Thankyou"

**OK there is second chapter. Hope you like. Reviews are nice. If you have suggestions pm me. :D yep still practically my life. **

**XxxAshleighxxX**


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